Shrink Proof

Did you ever get to hear the outcome? Genuine query...

Just a click away...

Resigned to spend more time with his familiars.

Back to 1976, eh? "Get off your arse..."

Such is their level of self-awareness that now that there's due to be a by-election in Chester (Labour MP resigned), presumably the Tories will be selecting Owen Paterson as their candidate.

Useless Track & Trace, furlough scams, HS2 to extend the commuter belt and ripple out high house prices a bit further from London, aircraft carriers without aircraft, nuclear weapons to keep us safe and prove we're a global superpower, 757 unelected members of the House of Lords, etc., etc.

Still, it's not all bad news for Truss. She made it into the history books. The shortest-serving prime minister in UK history.

The better vegetable won.

A mere 38 minutes later...

"Downing Street said there are no plans for Liz Truss to hold a press conference or to make any more changes to her cabinet today." - The Guardian The same "Downing Street" that said they weren't aware that Brady of the 1922 was meeting Truss, even as he was arriving (via the back door).

It looks as though the lettuce might win. Despite Truss spending more time in a fridge.

"Look, it doesn't matter what happens, Truss has got to stay until October 31st. We've paid for that witch costume and they say they don't do refunds."

I dont know why everyone's getting so agitated and confused. It was a confidence vote, but not a confidence vote, and although it was a confidence vote & the chief Whip did resign, but did not resign, in fact she did resign & then unresign, which means that rebel MPs won't lose the whip but are at risk of losing the whip.

Westminster

My money was always on the lettuce.

True, but getting exponentially tougher over that time.

Yes, I'm sure they have the national interest at heart...

Hardest job in Britain today? Political satirist.

The jolly, grinning Head Girl ("pork markets!!") is now the terrified child who's been found out, who either runs away and hides, or sits, arms folded, as a scowling little madam in a tantrum.

Indeed. A two party, in-out, FPTP, non accountable, crony-based, political system breeds incompetence, corruption and abuse of power.

They would've done better to interview the lettuce.

There's enough in Truss for an entire Psychiatry conference on Personality Dysfunction.

Amazing what you can achieve with enough medication...

Who is running the country? The Daily Mash has the answer...

True. Plus, staying on gives you two more years of MP's salary, pension contributions, taxpayer subsidised food & drink, expenses claims and chances to shmooze your way into post-election non-jobs.