The XYY Man

I saw it. XYY

I hate no-one - nor do I preach hate. I am an adult and as such, can enjoy robust debate. Sadly, places I can enjoy such debate are disappearing quicker than monkeys in Hartlepool. The world just gets shittier every year... XYY The dog's kennel is not the place to keep a sausage - Danish proverb

XYY The dog's kennel is not the place to keep a sausage - Danish Proverb

May the force live long and prosper..! XYY

One of the IT guys at work is the most pedantic "jobs worth" I have ever met - and gets paid a fortune for pressing ctrl-alt-delete, and never stops telling you how clever he is and how dumb everyone else is. His latest wheeze is to replace all the white network patch-cables running to-and-from the switching cabinets to colour-coded ones - yellow ones for computer data, and blue for the phones. This is costing a small fortune for the new leads, and his overtime of course...! I have to fix faults on my machines on the shop-floor - and whenever I suspect a network issue, I take great delight using the wrong colour leads to diagnose the problem before I call him down and watch that vein in his temple pulsate..! Childish of me I know... XYY

You IT bods always make me laugh. Just send me my new email password - and crawl back under your rock... XYY The dog's kennel is not the place to keep a sausage - Danish proverb

Aw that's excellent news Knock-out - my books were due back in September 1992...! XYY

Well that bet has been well and truly "Welshed" on...! XYY

So the Jocks and the folk in London appear to want the same thing. How mad is that..? Being from County Durham - an area well pillaged by the toffs in London over the years - I have always felt a kinship with the Scots. But after being given your chance last year - which you bottled - you now bleat at those of us south of the border who have chosen the freedom that you lot have craved for centuries, and yet reject it when you are offered it on a plate..! Just when exactly did you Buckfast-drinking bastards turn so soft...? XYY

I'm pretty sure there are a few on here who do post under their own name, or something close to it. When I analyse it, the only reason that I use a non-de-plume is simply because that seems to be the etiquette of web forums. After considering this most carefully, I realise that I am more than happy to use my real identity from now on. Regards, King Dong

Comback m-eight... XYY

I am not Will Self. But then neither is he... XYY

As a bit of a gossip, I'm intrigued to know why you need reassurance that it's confidential sporty. My imagination is running wild - and is currently guessing that your neighbour's started keeping chickens - and you want to know if there's a covenant being breached then so you can have them done for it..? Howay man, spill the beans...! XYY

70..? No way. The numbers quoted in the press are beginning to sound highly distorted... XYY

I don't come up here from the off-topic forum very often. But when I do have a lurk - and read posts from people who are seemingly crowing with delight over the loss of jobs in some of the poorest parts of the UK - well then I feel that I simply must respond. Despite being brought-up never to wish ill on any person, I make an exception here - and wish a particularly nasty, scabby, pus-encrusted malaise on every single one of you blood-sucking, parasitic, inter-bred, bell-ends. I further hope that at least 50% of your testicles are - most amateurishly and painfully - removed from their position somewhere below your rancid, flaccid excuse for a nob as soon as is feasibly possible. And that all medical attempts to stop the remaining stump from turning gangrenous fail miserably. {....sharp intake of breath...} [...And out...] Well, I guess I got that off me chest. See y'all on "off-topic" real soon - and y'all have a nice day now... XYY

Brantano...? Good riddance. Right bunch of brogue traders if you ask me... XYY

Hugs from a renter in one of the scummier villages in South East Durham Mr Eight - I've always liked your posts...! (Just doffing my cap to you, your eight-ship sir. Who knows - in a few years you could well be my land-lord...!!!) XYY PS: Well that's another one of my thrice-a-year visits outside the off-topic forum over and done with...

Hi campy, I don't venture up here from "Off-Topic" very often, but every once-in-a-while I simply must. And it is usually when someone claims that there is a housing shortage in the UK. Because there simply isn't. Go to HM Land Registry website, and find your way to stats regarding the amount of empty properties in England and Wales. The number will be somewhere around 700,000. And that doesn't include Scotland or Northern Ireland. These are official UK Government stats. There is, nor has there EVER been any shortage of housing in the UK. Just a shortage of people who will allow cheap access to them. Well that's it, job done. I'm heading back to "Off-Topic" - see you all the next time someone uses the fallacious "housing-shortage" argument... XYY

Ah, so you've had mixed beers before - maybe they've changed the deal then..? Must confess I haven't been in since the week before Christmas - my local Co-op's prices were just as competitive over the festive season after factoring in the petrol for the 16 or 18 mile round-trip to either Tesco. Will check it out on Saturday as it's "visit the mother-in-law in Hartlepool" weekend... XYY

I'm no fan of Tesco, but I have taken advantage of the 4 for £6 offer at both their Durham and Hartlepool stores for most of 2014 and can assure you it applied to any combination of 4 beers that were marked as 4 for £6 in the two stores mentioned. (Watch that you haven't picked up a brew that isn't part of the deal - the Durham shop is particularly sly at mixing a few that aren't on the deal on the same shelves as those that are...!) If you wish to make your point with your local branch, I am happy to buy a mix of these this weekend and post a scan of the till receipt on this thread. I may even find a few around the house as I am a compulsive keeper of receipts. You can then go in and tell them to price match their own shops...! Offer's there mate if you want it... XYY

Well their Durham branch got one more shopper last Sunday. Newcy Brown at £3.50 for four cans - I cleared the friggin' shelves man...! XYY

Propaganda it may be. But the loosening of the bowels, and draining of all colour from the faces of amateur landlords throughout the UK that this kind of story causes makes it very much my favourite kind of propaganda... XYY

Aretha knows the answer, doesn't she children...? Would you like to hear her sing it...? Jolly good - here we go then... XYY