Deluded Old Scrapper Birds On Dating Sites

[Wario]

... guy is ginger ffs and possesses the emotional depth and sensitivity of a sea-cucumber yet he has dates week in; week out. While i'm doing the domestic 'bliss' malarkey each time I seem him it invariably leads to which lass (and from what nation) he's banging ...

Oi! Oi! Don't you be giving all our tangerine secrets away, son.

He's lying about E-hummus and all that mince.

Simple fact is, ginger is the new black. Even the Walrus of Lurve is thinking of changing his name to Barry Ginger.

It's a Neanderthal thing (ok different gene, but), and birds go for it.

Just ask that clarty article "ccc" what sort of filth he gets up to, for example.

I'm always up for a bit of intromission m'self, now you come to mention it.

[Guest Noodle]

Oi! Oi! Don't you be giving all our tangerine secrets away, son.

He's lying about E-hummus and all that mince.

Simple fact is, ginger is the new black. Even the Walrus of Lurve is thinking of changing his name to Barry Ginger.

It's a Neanderthal thing (ok different gene, but), and birds go for it.

Just ask that clarty article "ccc" what sort of filth he gets up to, for example.

I'm always up for a bit of intromission m'self, now you come to mention it.

[helenreed]

Whilst watching the box one night, I saw an ad for E-harmony offering a free go.

So I logged on, and filled out their forms.

Bastards Rejected me.

Considering sueing for mental scarring.

Dan1 - I have a female friend who was also rejected by them. Unbelievable.

I do agree with the unrealistic expectations. However the women are no worse than the blokes to be honest.

I do hate the way they give you a certain amount of words to either describe yourself or describe the sort of person you do not want to meet. It's the same old 'outgoing', 'romantic' or 'attractive' stuff. ALL women are going to put romantic (except me) and the word I noticed that most men used to describe what was not required was 'sarcastic'. I am therefore totally out of the running. I also noticed a huge amount of men (and women) put down, even if they are not religious, that they are 'spiritual'. I don't want that.

I would also like to point out that there are obvious blokes on these sites who have got divorced, lost their home and seem to require a divorced women with kids and house so they can live somewhere, other than with parents/grotty flatshare, and have somewhere half decent to bring their own kids to when it's their weekend to have their own sprogs.

Deluded women AND men is my observation.

[Milton]

Dan1 - I have a female friend who was also rejected by them. Unbelievable.

I do agree with the unrealistic expectations. However the women are no worse than the blokes to be honest.

I do hate the way they give you a certain amount of words to either describe yourself or describe the sort of person you do not want to meet. It's the same old 'outgoing', 'romantic' or 'attractive' stuff. ALL women are going to put romantic (except me) and the word I noticed that most men used to describe what was not required was 'sarcastic'. I am therefore totally out of the running. I also noticed a huge amount of men (and women) put down, even if they are not religious, that they are 'spiritual'. I don't want that.

I would also like to point out that there are obvious blokes on these sites who have got divorced, lost their home and seem to require a divorced women with kids and house so they can live somewhere, other than with parents/grotty flatshare, and have somewhere half decent to bring their own kids to when it's their weekend to have their own sprogs.

Deluded women AND men is my observation.

Hi Helen.

I did send them an email asking why, and apparently they reject up to 25% of people......What pissed me off was that they were asking for very personal information. In truth Ive never liked the idea of anything like that. And as stated. Late, inebriated, god knows what I wrote./

It feels to me like you reach a certain age. Late thirties. And suddenly your options are very much reduced. Divorced women with kids, with low expectations. Not for me thanks very much. [No kids myself, never married]

Or go the other way. A younger woman in her mid twenties. That pretty much sums up every bloke I know.

*Or option C. Just go through life alone, becoming a little bit more bitter, grumpy, and a little bit more lonely every day.

[General Melchett]

to pull any of the millions of members,

Try visiting a different sort of dating site.

[DrMartinSanchez]

Whilst watching the box one night, I saw an ad for E-harmony offering a free go.

So I logged on, and filled out their forms.

Bastards Rejected me.

Considering sueing for mental scarring.

I just tried creating an account (takes ages to answer all their stupid questions, most of which are duplicates), and eventually ended up on the rejected pile

A Google search later, I seem to understand that eHarmony will only accept flawless christian people.

[JustYield]

*Or option C. Just go through life alone, becoming a little bit more bitter, grumpy, and a little bit more lonely every day.

Just picking up on this comment - if you can't go through life alone and be reasonably content, then it is a unlikely a partner will fix that completely. Remember most men are destined to lead lives of quiet desperation - partners don't change that, they simply provide social cover and one or two other things.

The world's your oyster, mate! Late 30s - means anyone over 28 is fair game. Travel light and avoid other people's dramas.

Sorry which forum is this? <Alt-Tab, Alt-Tab...>

[Concrete Jungle]

When I tried internet dating I met one nice young lady my own age. I did get lots of messages off older women from late 30's - 40's!

[Guest Noodle]

Just picking up on this comment - if you can't go through life alone and be reasonably content, then it is a unlikely a partner will fix that completely. Remember most men are destined to lead lives of quiet desperation - partners don't change that, they simply provide social cover and one or two other things.

The world's your oyster, mate! Late 30s - means anyone over 28 is fair game. Travel light and avoid other people's dramas.

Sorry which forum is this? <Alt-Tab, Alt-Tab...>

I think true enlightenment is summed up in the excellent, all encompassing response of 'Go find somebody that gives a fuck!' Or, 'I do apologize I think you having me mistaken with someone that gives a fuck.'

So most men need to mediate on that.

Alone is psychologically very easy . . . once you have children. Must be a biological thing more related to lions and tigers and David Attenborough and stuff.

[swissy_fit]

Alone is psychologically very easy . . . once you have children. Must be a biological thing more related to lions and tigers and David Attenborough and stuff.

How true. Wish I'd known that beforehand though!

[Guest Noodle]

How true. Wish I'd known that beforehand though!

Remember this, if/when it does happen, even old geezers get that 'rebound' nonsense. Hence why the other day I was urging you to find a hobby.

I've never been happier!

[winkie]

Girls on dating sites usually belong to one or more of the following categories:

- Terribly unattractive

- Uninteresting / bad personality

- Career woman (e.g I want a man because I don't have time for a dog)

- Illiterate

- Alcoholic

- Single mum

- Gold diggers / Wants to meet Brad Pitt lookalike with big wallet

- Old girl desperate for babies

I speak from experience

....that list made me laugh.....

[samwise]

I think a lot of it is your own perceptions and also, possibly, the way in which you sell yourself.

I went on Match.com a few years ago and got no replies. Joined eHarmony last October and before the end of the month I was chatting daily to a woman just over a year younger than me - that rare catch of late 30s, never married, no kids, nice person etc.

Up until my mid -30s, I had an idealised picture of what I wanted in a woman, but after some counselling for travel anxiety that went further, I lightened up a lot. Whether this came through in my eHarmony 'sales page' or not, I don't know, but I've been happier with who I am and the relationship I'm in now, then I think I ever have before.

Luckily, my match doesn't match any of DrMartinSantchez's criteria, although she would like a child (but wouldn't be worried if none came - sensible as we're both late 30s)

[monty1080]

I think a lot of it is your own perceptions and also, possibly, the way in which you sell yourself.

I went on Match.com a few years ago and got no replies.  Joined eHarmony last October and before the end of the month I was chatting daily to a woman just over a year younger than me - that rare catch of late 30s, never married, no kids, nice person etc.

Up until my mid -30s, I had an idealised picture of what I wanted in a woman, but after some counselling for travel anxiety that went further, I lightened up a lot.  Whether this came through in my eHarmony 'sales page' or not, I don't know, but I've been happier with who I am and the relationship I'm in now, then I think I ever have before.

Luckily, my match doesn't match any of DrMartinSantchez's criteria, although she would like a child (but wouldn't be worried if none came - sensible as we're both late 30s)  

Why ? My first child was born when I was 39. (The missus was 29)

[swissy_fit]

Why ? My first child was born when I was 39. (The missus was 29)

Female fertility diminishes sharply after 35.

There are increased chances of genetic abnormalities as well (that bit goes for both men and women)

[DrMartinSanchez]

Why ? My first child was born when I was 39. (The missus was 29)

The risk of giving birth to a child with a genetic defect increases when women get past the age of 35.

[swissy_fit]

More for women - our eggs are as old as we are whereas half of your sperm didn't exist this morning.

ALL of it didn't exist this morning.

[monty1080]

The risk of giving birth to a child with a genetic defect increases when women get past the age of 35.

Yes I'm well aware of the risks, but the poster seems hopeful that he won't have a child. Many people, especially now, are having children later and later. He said '....wouldn't be worried if none came.....' ,is that because of the potential risks or because he just doesn't want a toddler when he's in his 40s ? And BTW are you going to tell a clucky woman in her late 30s not to get pregnant ?? Good luck with that.

[CarbonBasedLifeform]

I think true enlightenment is summed up in the excellent, all encompassing response of 'Go find somebody that gives a fuck!' Or, 'I do apologize I think you having me mistaken with someone that gives a fuck.'

So most men need to mediate on that.

Alone is psychologically very easy . . . once you have children. Must be a biological thing more related to lions and tigers and David Attenborough and stuff.

Agree 100% with the above, now i,m 42 i dont have that "physical need" to have constant female company, although i do find your earlier post saying its great not to have to have sex ever again a bit sad, how old are you? I still enjoy female company i just dont want or need "in house pussy" anymore.

Women get pissed of with men when they can no longer control them using sex, they tend to say that you are boring, the reality is that wer,e just not that into you anymore. As we get older we require more visual stimulation than the AVERAGE woman over 35 can provide to get us interested and we tend to put our energies into other areas of our life.

Women generally find this loss of power difficult to accept and they can make your life hell as a result.

[Wario]

... you going to tell a clucky woman in her late 30s not to get pregnant ?? Good luck with that.

True dat

Not trying to start some competitive spawning league here, but to line up with Monty and stop people worrying themselves so much (or alternatively scaring them to death, depending on what they expect )

Young Peach, 'er indoors, exposed the first one to the atmosphere age 35¹/₂.

Mind you she was pretty good about it, packed in the diet of Embassy Regal and the gallons of ale a few months before going for it (probably losing out on vitamins as she's a veggy).

No hanging about. We're lucky; I merely have to sneeze violently near a lady, once, and she's up the duff. Has led to awkward, unexpected scenes in the past.

.

She was still at it age 40, popping 'em out at home in a giant bucket of water (the first one was lucky to escape the filthy, understocked maternity ward alive, due to the slovenliness and nastiness of the staff. She did the whole thing with no anaesthesia, and not through choice (same thing happened the second time at home, some caring fellow-professional had nicked crucial stuff from our midwife's bag. There's a lesson in there somewhere :angry: )

A mate of hers was in upstairs at the same time, baby died of some grotty hospital infection. Yards from where Conan Doyle lived as a medical student. Things did not appear to have improved since his day.)

The number they worked out for Down's for us for the first one I remember easily. 1:1649 (St George's Hill, see?) Fairly negligible, they assured us.

[Sibley's Love Child]

I automatically assumed that they had decided I would be unable to pull any of the millions of members, [including said old scrapper birds.]

Ferking insulting.:angry:

This should make you feel better. I used to live in a house-share with this real pish-taker but up-for-a-laugh bloke called Bren. Anyway, I made the mistake of letting him know that i'd joined an on-line dating agency called Loopylove.com (first one from the google search results). Bear in mind that I got sweet Fanny Adams in terms of action from said site. Ironically on the same night I met my now wife I got proper battered, so much so that by the time i'd crawled home I thought i'd listen to some music in my room before going to bad; before I passed out it didn't occur to me how loud it was in my ill-judged inebriation.

Wake up in the morning - not only with a stonking hangover - naked on my bed except for my skidders round me ankles (I daren't think of the ramifications); and that amnesiac sense of foreboding that invariably accompanies a really heavy session. Lo and behold, I receive a multimedia text message on my phone; upon opening it I see the moving vision of yours truly in a rather compromising postion on the bed with the words 'Loopylove here I come - Tw*t'...

Needless to say, my music had disturbed him so he'd come into my room to investigate and was greeted with an opportunity too good to pass-up.

That one's on me.

[Guest absolutezero]

My mate swears by E-Harmony; reckons that there's an inbalance of women to men.

Seriously, this guy is ginger ffs and possesses the emotional depth and sensitivity of a sea-cucumber yet he has dates week in; week out. While i'm doing the domestic 'bliss' malarkey each time I seem him it invariably leads to which lass (and from what nation) he's banging before he gets bored again. He should rename himself Kofi Annan with all the work he does for international relations.

From my own experiences ginger blokes are usually VERY well endowed....

[Sibley's Love Child]

From my own experiences ginger blokes are usually VERY well endowed....

Damn, so he earns more than double what I do, has a knack with the women AND possibly has a huge schlong?

Feckin' hell.

[Guest absolutezero]

Damn, so he earns more than double what I do, has a knack with the women AND possibly has a huge schlong?

Feckin' hell.

I know. It's just not fair.

The Gods afflicted them with gingerness but more than paid them back with the contents of their underpants...

[DrMartinSanchez]

You know the deluded types that are found on crap like xfactor who are completly convinced that they are the next celine dion etc even though they can,t sing a note these sites are full of the dating equivelent. Fat unattractive with 5 bellies ,6 double chins, bingo wings, dressed in tents and with 3 kids in tow and living in a crappy ex council house , thay have a list of qualities that you must have and say things like "must know how to treat a lady" ie spend lots of cash on me and "princess looking for knight etc" usually the wrong side of 35 and with more issues than heather mills, They actually seem to believe they can be choosy they send you a message and if you dont reply they sometimes get all stroppy,

I also noticed that a large part of the ladies on dating sites cannot use proper spelling, grammar or punctuation. This also includes girls who are qualified / educated and have high position jobs.

(Some of which can't even spell their job title correctly )

Is this part of a trend (ie trying to sound cool or friendly) ?