CarbonBasedLifeform

Deluded Old Scrapper Birds On Dating Sites

11,316 posts in this topic

I always check the buns out first. I like a nice bap but I tend to go for some nice firm round buns given the choice. Soft well rounded baps are good too.

Then I check if either is wearing a wedding ring and, if not, I start the buttering up. ;)

Do you chew the crust?

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Lol at this, but pray tell TMT, I'm interested.

I've only been chatted up once In a supermarket- 10pm after a hard late shift, buying cat food and wine, a skinny little chap in office wear tried not once but twice to engage me in conversation (I was in bus uniform). First time was (IIRC) 'I do like a man in uniform', second was some cat chat. I politely brushed him off both times. I had to admire his bravery TBH- admittedly I've had far more attention from men than women since I got married, but I was still a 13 stone skinhead rolling purposefully round a supermarket in SE London!

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Lol at this, but pray tell TMT, I'm interested.

I've only been chatted up once In a supermarket- 10pm after a hard late shift, buying cat food and wine, a skinny little chap in office wear tried not once but twice to engage me in conversation (I was in bus uniform). First time was (IIRC) 'I do like a man in uniform', second was some cat chat. I politely brushed him off both times. I had to admire his bravery TBH- admittedly I've had far more attention from men than women since I got married, but I was still a 13 stone skinhead rolling purposefully round a supermarket in SE London!

They sense something inside of you wanting to break free :blink:

I am not going to give you my moves on here... it is the only move I have... but it involves crusty rolls... and is surprsingly successful... probably because it is not something a girl gets asked...

Move on over to the fish counter or the tinned goods... No, hang on... stay away from tinned goods... I have some success there also... Put this way... women like a man who knows whether a multi-buy is ripping them off or not... the girls who don't care are best avoided anyhow as they would spend all your money on false special offers...

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I saw this documentary about a young Jack-the-lad once, he went out on the pull in discos in some northern town.

His technique was simply to slap the a*se of any young woman he felt he had a chance with. If she turned round and smiled, he knew he was in.

And regularly was.

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Me and a mate ages ago stood in a busy pub toilet and slapped the **** of every burd that came out. Surprisingly we weren't chucked out and not even one complained. Most actually smiled.

Burds really are strange creatures.

Edited by ccc

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Me and a mate ages ago stood in a busy pub toilet and slapped the **** of every burd that came out. Surprisingly we weren't chucked out and not even one complained. Most actually smiled.

Burds really are strange creatures.

Do you not run the risk of getting into a scrap with an angry boyfriend using this tactic? Aside from that, it's a pretty direct opener and with enough perseverance will probably get you some action.

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Do you not run the risk of getting into a scrap with an angry boyfriend using this tactic? Aside from that, it's a pretty direct opener and with enough perseverance will probably get you some action.

Do you want action with a woman who considers this a good approach?

I guess I must be a snob!

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We were totally smashed at the time to be fair.

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Do you want action with a woman who considers this a good approach?

I guess I must be a snob!

Indeed.

I think you're quite right about classes and such like been better ways of meeting women than dating sites. Now that my lad's getting older, I should really make some more time for myself and join up for something - maybe a language course - where I might find a better class of female.

As I mentioned on my rather facetious post on the "lube" thread, I have rejoined match.com, but only because they were offering a special low price. It's really just a bit of kite-flying on my part, just in case someone should happen to meet my pretty specific wants. Just yesterday I got a rather irate message from some semi-literate hag complaining that my requirements are far too demanding and insisting that I should lower my expectations. :lol: I don't think so. If there's one thing my last experience taught me, it's that being single can be far preferable to a relationship with the wrong woman.

BTW, I get the impression that match.com might be struggling against the competition these days. Their website is a bit buggy now, and their Android app is, frankly, crap. They seem to be throwing all their cash into marketing at the expense of website development and maintenance.

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Do you want action with a woman who considers this a good approach?

I guess I must be a snob!

No, I wouldn't. But I've kind of given up looking for a 'good' woman (on dating sites anyway) based on the 15 or so characters ive met from dating sites over the last year and a bit, and seeing what alot of women actually respond to.

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Indeed.

I think you're quite right about classes and such like been better ways of meeting women than dating sites. Now that my lad's getting older, I should really make some more time for myself and join up for something - maybe a language course - where I might find a better class of female.

As I mentioned on my rather facetious post on the "lube" thread, I have rejoined match.com, but only because they were offering a special low price. It's really just a bit of kite-flying on my part, just in case someone should happen to meet my pretty specific wants. Just yesterday I got a rather irate message from some semi-literate hag complaining that my requirements are far too demanding and insisting that I should lower my expectations. :lol: I don't think so. If there's one thing my last experience taught me, it's that being single can be far preferable to a relationship with the wrong woman.

BTW, I get the impression that match.com might be struggling against the competition these days. Their website is a bit buggy now, and their Android app is, frankly, crap. They seem to be throwing all their cash into marketing at the expense of website development and maintenance.

I think this is generally good advice - get some hobbies and not only will it make you a more interesting person, you'll meet other interesting people, who are more likely to be sane.

This is my plan anyway!

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Ok lets turn it around.

You are a bloke in a bar. You feel a wee smack on the ass. Burd walks past and gives you a wee smile.

Would you be bothered ? Of course not. Especially if you liked the look of her.

Now we all know men and women can be very different. But in this case i don't think there is much of a gap.

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Ok lets turn it around.

You are a bloke in a bar. You feel a wee smack on the ass. Burd walks past and gives you a wee smile.

Would you be bothered ? Of course not. Especially if you liked the look of her.

Now we all know men and women can be very different. But in this case i don't think there is much of a gap.

If she was fanciable, I'd assume she was a prostitute; if not, I'd feel slightly queasy.

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If she was fanciable, I'd assume she was a prostitute; if not, I'd feel slightly queasy.

Come on - live a little !!

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Me and a mate ages ago stood in a busy pub toilet and slapped the **** of every burd that came out. Surprisingly we weren't chucked out and not even one complained. Most actually smiled.

Burds really are strange creatures.

You were in the women's toilets?

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That is so funny.

Actually, by chance I logged on to POF this week - not been on there for a long, long time - and was shocked to see pretty much the same women on there as were there 3 or 4 years back.

My main dating is now done in the food halls of M&S and Sainsburys. I have perfected a naff chat-up technique involving crusty rolls :o

LOL

I became single again May so on returning to Oz decided to join up again. Low and behold same thing - same old faces including my Ex using the same tired pictures they were using in 2012 and probably a few years old then. :lol:

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Anyone got any positive online dating stories lately?

Friend of a friend met a woman the other week from t'internet for the first time, said his hello, asked her what she wanted to drink.

While he was queuing at the bar he got a message from her slagging him off in a number of ways. The silly bitch had meant to send it to one of her friends but sent it to his phone by mistake.

Apparently he cancelled the drink, went back to her and told her in no uncertain terms what a nasty bitch she was, and promptly left. The 'date' lasted all of 10 mins.

I'm back in the game. Really using it to keep myself social and the conversation skills up. Haven't had any bad experiences as such. First one I met was a bit of churchy nut but otherwise civil. 2nd went better and will see about a follow up. Meeting a girl of Persian origin tonight. I hope she is of Zoroastrian heritage as I'm not getting involved with a follower of the Prophet <_<

I just bang out expressions of interest to anything I half like the look and sound of. Getting a reasonable positive response rate of about 1 in 3. Otherwise generally get a civil response but no thanks.

Edited by Kurt Barlow

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You were in the women's toilets?

Nah outside it. But another time we did go in the burds bog.

Interesting really. Burds are not half as bothered by this sort of thing as we are led to believe.

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After setting up a pof profile sometime back with a comprehensive profile and pictures with engaging initial messages I thought it would be straight forwards to set up real world dates.

How wrong I was. It was a total waste of time. I barely got any introductory messages and 90% of my well thought out messages got no response.

Fast forward to last month my friend complained of exactly the same, so I decided on a little social experiment.

I set up a profile with the bare minimum in the profile, just saying I'm new to the area and looking for fun (no more than two lines) coupled with a single picture of a stereotypical alpha male in a wife beater (6ft2 and good looking).

I didn't quite expect a deluge of messages ( early on 5 to 6 a day), and over 90% of messages I sent out were responded to ( these were crap ones starting out with 'hey, what's up', 'up for some adventures?' Etc). I was offered phone numbers, meet up requests and even last night a woman gave me her address to visit her after a night out!

Sometimes to lose some of these women (I couldn't juggle them all) I would say something overtly sexual (the messages they claim they hate) but on the whole they would respond positively and loved me being forthright! These were also from all manner of women, from the stupid chav with a profile written like Chaucer to the most erudite and apparently intelligent of the species that inhabit online dating with serious prim and proper profiles.

It is very apparent that women are as much if not more superficial than the men when it comes to the sweet shop that online dating represents.

I've just killed the fake profile before Mr H broke too many hearts.

Yes, you will be knee deep if you look like Clark Kent and appeal to the primal instincts of the fairer sex (even very average women feel they are in with a chance). Otherwise, you will giving your self confidence a beating if you are anywhere near the normal distribution curve.

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Yes, you will be knee deep if you look like Clark Kent and appeal to the primal instincts of the fairer sex (even very average women feel they are in with a chance). Otherwise, you will giving your self confidence a beating if you are anywhere near the normal distribution curve.

Congratulations - you've gotten a glimpse into the world of the 'alpha male'. I'd be interested to see the picture you used; as well as being the wife beating type, I'll take a guess that prince charming was:

1. not looking directly at the camera

2. wasn't smiling

I say this because I've read studies that have shown that doing the above increases mens chances on dating sites.

For more on the hypergamy and (some) womens biological drives, see Chateau Heartiste. If your the sensitive type, brace yourself:

http://heartiste.wordpress.com/

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They sense something inside of you wanting to break free :blink:

I am not going to give you my moves on here... it is the only move I have... but it involves crusty rolls... and is surprsingly successful... probably because it is not something a girl gets asked...

Move on over to the fish counter or the tinned goods... No, hang on... stay away from tinned goods... I have some success there also... Put this way... women like a man who knows whether a multi-buy is ripping them off or not... the girls who don't care are best avoided anyhow as they would spend all your money on false special offers...

White or brown?

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After setting up a pof profile sometime back with a comprehensive profile and pictures with engaging initial messages I thought it would be straight forwards to set up real world dates.

How wrong I was. It was a total waste of time. I barely got any introductory messages and 90% of my well thought out messages got no response.

Fast forward to last month my friend complained of exactly the same, so I decided on a little social experiment.

I set up a profile with the bare minimum in the profile, just saying I'm new to the area and looking for fun (no more than two lines) coupled with a single picture of a stereotypical alpha male in a wife beater (6ft2 and good looking).

I didn't quite expect a deluge of messages ( early on 5 to 6 a day), and over 90% of messages I sent out were responded to ( these were crap ones starting out with 'hey, what's up', 'up for some adventures?' Etc). I was offered phone numbers, meet up requests and even last night a woman gave me her address to visit her after a night out!

Sometimes to lose some of these women (I couldn't juggle them all) I would say something overtly sexual (the messages they claim they hate) but on the whole they would respond positively and loved me being forthright! These were also from all manner of women, from the stupid chav with a profile written like Chaucer to the most erudite and apparently intelligent of the species that inhabit online dating with serious prim and proper profiles.

It is very apparent that women are as much if not more superficial than the men when it comes to the sweet shop that online dating represents.

I've just killed the fake profile before Mr H broke too many hearts.

Yes, you will be knee deep if you look like Clark Kent and appeal to the primal instincts of the fairer sex (even very average women feel they are in with a chance). Otherwise, you will giving your self confidence a beating if you are anywhere near the normal distribution curve.

Pretty much sums up my experience in the UK

Here in Oz I have faired a little better although have met the same usual suspects - religious freaks and borderline bunny boilers. Also found that a little overweight means bodyframe of Pat Butcher :lol:

Encouragingly I met a degree qualified Iranian woman on Saturday who was a cracker - very elegant, erudite, and nothing like most Aussie women (tats, crude, overweight, self obsessed). Meeting for coffee turned into 4 hours of interesting chat. Got a follow up offer of dinner on Wednesday so fingers crossed B)

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